Yeah, I'm still here. I've been spending the last two weeks apartment-hunting, hence the silence. I think I've finally settled on a place, though.

If you've heard anything about Tokyo apartment-hunting, you know it's a dire, punishing ordeal. First, you need to actually find a habitable, affordable apartment in the most expensive, crowded city on Earth. Then you need to find a native Japanese person who can co-sign your rental agreement. Then you're ready to meet your landlord, who is not required by law to refrain from discriminating against foreigners. If all goes well, you can then fork over the "key money," which is a bribe (as in, not a deposit) equal to 4-6 months' rent. Additionally, one month's rent goes to the agency who found the place for you, and finally one month's rent goes to, well, rent.

I wanna give a big shout out to Maki Saito over at Kimi Information Center, who tirelessly combed through a mountain of faxed floorplans to locate what I hope will be my future home—a clean, quiet loft with a high ceiling, hardwood floors and ample closet space, just ten minutes from Ikebukuro station.

The meeting with the landlady and subsequent bribery is scheduled for next Wednesday, after which I reckon it'll be official: I'm moving to Tokyo.

I plan to celebrate by filing for Chapter 11 bankruptcy.